Mother’s Day is coming, you see reminders of it all over the place. Pink hearts, roses, breakfasts, all things mom.
And though I love almost anything that’s a celebration, I think about those people who never had a mother, are searching for their mothers, have a mom that’s far away, or like in my case, have lost a mother.
Dear mom: I love you.
Is it possible to share the love for Mother’s Day without a mom to pamper or a mom to tell them how much she means to you?
Well, I’ve put together these 9 pretty neat ways to join in the celebration. No matter your mom situation.
These women are the “mom” figures for a lot of people. They were there during some trying times and there during the great times. They shared in the joy when your mom was holding you, or knew your mom.
If you didn’t have a chance to know your mom, these women were the ones that looked out for you – like a mother would. Celebrate them.
For the day. Just like you, there are women out there who have lost a loved one. Except they’ve lost a child. You can make a difference in their lives by remembering them and spending some time with them on this day.
Nursing homes are the first place I can think of. There are women there that have either lost their child, never had children, or have been forgotten by their children. Call to ask if there’s a special Mother’s Day breakfast or something and if you can come for a visit.
If you’ve lost your mom, this one is a great way to send some love out to her. Listen to her favorite songs and, maybe, share some memories with a friend. Think about her and let go.
But take these words, if the loss has been recent, I’d skip this one. It’s too fresh and you may go down a rabbit hole you may have difficulty climbing out of.
In her honour. Buy a stranger a coffee. Compliment someone on their hair. Wipe off the bird poop from someone’s car window. Anything that will put a smile on someone else’s face. Do it for your mom, her memory, or the idea of who she is.
We could all use good deeds and smiles, get the ripple effect started.
What was your mom’s favorite past time? Did she like gardening? Plant a tree or trim some bushes. Did she love animals? Spend an afternoon at the local shelter or bathe the neighbours dog. How about reading? Read to a senior or a child.
You never know, you may even want to dedicate a few hours a week from then on. And it would have all started with your mom.
Give your kids the love you either had or wish you had growing up. Appreciate them and let them know you do. Teach them about their grandma, share anecdotes. Love them and play with them. Bake with them if they’re young, dedicate a cupcake to your mom. Spend time with them and simply say ‘thank you’.
You don’t have to do anything to keep her memory alive. Simply take a few minutes to think about her, that’s it. The memories will always be with you, no matter what day of the year it is.
Take a few moments out of your day to take care of yourself and dedicate your thoughts to her. Toast to her – say with a mimosa for brunch?
Friends and close relatives will usually invite you to join in their celebration. If you feel comfortable with their family, why not go? They would be happy to have you and not wonder about what you’d be doing instead. Friends are strange like that, they want to keep an eye on you during tricky holidays.
If you go, do make sure to contribute something to the day. A gift for the mom, cookies for the group, or cash toward the food.
If you’re married or with a long-term partner, the mother-in-law becomes your extended mom. Hopefully she’s nice. Celebrate her. Be part of planning, surprise her with a card. Even though you may not see her as a mom, she’s one of the most important people in your partner’s life. Share with them.
I know it’s hard to even think about getting yourself out of the thought process of “I don’t have a mom – anymore”, but in reality, you always do. Whether you grew up with them, never met them, are far away from them, or simply grew apart from them, part of you will always be thanks to her. It takes two to make a one, right?
Though nothing will ever replace the void, you can choose to do nothing or make the day a little more special.